goodbye twentyeleven youhavebeengoodtome

so last year i wrote this post for 2010.
before i started writing this one, i read that old one.

and it made my heart ache.

i dont know why.

my life was so good that year, and then turned so bad.

but for some reason, i miss it.

anyways. 

GOODBYE 2011

you have been so good to me!

but sadly, i think it is time for us to part!

hello 2012!

please dont kill us this year!

hello new years resolutions (that i will actually keep)

hello to a brand new year of new chances, new romances, and new friends.

but first, lets look back on the good (AND bad) of

2011

and because i love to over complicate my life (which includes my blog)

i am adding a bunch of extras for each month that last post didnt get

lets get started!

(p.s sometimes, in my journal, i write song lyrics that desribe my day, so those are the random song lyrics)

(oh and i will be leaving out all of the crazy drama that happened this year. although if i could, i would totally rip on everyone that was stupid this year.)

(im making this post sound way more important than it is. hahaha lets go)

January: it seems that in my life, januarys are never very exciting. it was an average month, spent with nikki and damon, doing normal teenage things like eating to much junk food, going to basketball games, getting hit on by boys who have girlfriends. haa yep that happened. the orem vs. mountain view basketball game was this month, and we won in overtime. there were so many crazies there!

"you smile, i smile"- 1/8/11 (u smile i smile - j.b.)

favorite january post

 

February: valentines day! choir concert! extensions! oh my my!! so vday. actually didnt suck for me this year. the andrew lloyd weber concert rocked, and i got my beautiful extentions. i went to every.single. basketball game. sooo many sophomore, junior and varsity games.

I scream your name, it always stays the same - 2/13/11 (freak the freak out - victoria justice)

pretty much describes the whole month

March: was full of changes. i decided to not try out for cheer.  i decided to not be part of some peoples lives. people around me changed. but it was full of fun things too! a photoshoot and a dance, and an adventure. march was also filled with lots of basketball games, homework, and the young womens broadcast. it was amazing this year!

if you love me, won't you let me know? - 3/29/11

the best day ever

April: was sooo freaakinnngg crazy! studco elections and fashion board application, losing studco elections and getting asked to prom, answering prom, seattle and the awesome movie party, easter and my birthday!, and finally PROM. this month was soooooooo crazy you guys dont even know. i was doing something literally every day. i hung out with leka a lot. i decided that i didnt want to wear extentions anymore, and that was a great moment. also, one day in spanish, my teacher asked me how old i was (in spanish of course) and i got to say i was sixteen. that was a great moment as well. oh and my mom threw me a suprise birthday party! april was just fantastic (:

"the girl in the dress cried all the way home" 4/3/11 (dear john - t swizzle)

my fav post (:

oookay. May: was a month of tryouts, definitly. i tried out for acapella and didnt make it. i didnt eat sugar the entire month and i was very proud of myself. i tried out (and made) fashion board, conbrio council, OYC and NHS. i guess those kind of made up for the heartbreak that came from not making it into acapella when all of my friends did. our soccer team made it to state, and we lost by one point. it was a heartbreaker. i opted out of morp (much to the sadness of the boy community at my school. HAHAHA i kid, i kid.) and made it out of sophomore year alive with a 4.0 average.

"its OBVIOUS that my heart beats for YOU" 5/4/11 (so obvious - runner runner)

the end of sophomore year

June: was a great month! summer started out awesome (: i started cross country again, went to my first midnight movie (the green lantern with nikki, dahlin and jake) my lil bro turned six, and i got my permit, took drivers ed, went to provo beach resort and went boating all in all a great month! i was sore all the time from xc, but i partied a lot. hahah

"thinking of you" 6/18/11 (thinking of you - katy perry)

best day of june

July: was a lot like april. a craaazy mother month. i was gone for 3 out of 4 weeks. first, i went to girls camp and then came home, went to a party, and the next day i left for idaho for my grandpas funeral. then i came back, pulled an all nighter, and the next day headed off to coeur d' alene. i absolutely loved it there! july was such a great month, full of friends and fun and new experiences (cliff jumping anyone?!) i kept running throughout my vaca's. i even ran at girls camp!

 "i see you, like a star in the sky" 7/31/11 (like a star - britt nicole)

i was mad...

August was not a good month.school started,  there was the first weekend of school.. i sucked at my xc race. i had blog drama. and boy drama. preettty much not a good month. ummm yep.

"I'M ON THE EDGE" 8/9/11 (edge of glory - gaga)

i finished almost all of my bucket list (:

September: was grand! i went to homecoming.... twice! went on a super fun date (and the wierdest weekend ever). my kitchen got redone. and i finally accepted that i didnt make acapella. it was a sad moment, but ive grown to love conbrio much more than i could have loved acapella. i had a lot of school troubles, and i threw nikki a surprise birthday party. it was a great start to junior year (:

"you rattle my bones" 9/26/11 (faster, matt nathanson)

best post!

October was an okay month. it snowed. and my phone died. the orem vs. mv game. which we lost. i thought a lot about the past, and what happened to me in october last year. and i finally let it go. it took a year, but i did it. i also had boy drama. good times? no!!! fall break was great and i worked on physics a lot. my life was busy! i went to a dance, and it was great.

p.s. this is my "I-am-going-to-kill-someone-because-of-all-this-drama-but-we-are-in-public-so-i-have-to-keep-it-inside"face

"I can see you there with the city lights, fourteenth floor, pale blue eyes" 10/16/11 (kiss me slowly -parachute)

i like to rant

November: was the great month of HAIR CHANGE. i love my red hair!! didnt go to sadies, got my cavities filled. 11/11/11 was this month, and i spent it with colton and jesse, nikki and jake, and i took family pictures, and had a freaking fantastic thanksgiving break. life was good during november (:

oh. i also finished personal progress! accomplishment right thar.

"ALL THE SINGLE LADIES" 11/27/11 (single ladies - beyonce)

this everyday

DECEMBER!! ahah really. a month of doing nothing.  i did alot of homework. went on a lot of field trips. DRAMA was stressed. had christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and stayed up really late wayyy too much. also i donated blood yesterday (: december brought a great end to a busy year (:

"doctors say im the illest, cause im suffering from realness" 12/5/11 (paris - kanye)

sometimes i like to post at 2. am about stupid stuff that no one cares about. deal with it.

WELP. there you have it folks. i hope you actually read this whole thing, because it took me FOUR FREAKING HOURS to write. yeah. i have no life. anyways. here is a list of people that have helped, hurt, or changed me this year.

MY PEEPS

nikki

landen

haley

jade

adam

colton

jake

megan

julia

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats it!

I LOVE YOU ALL!

HUGS AND KISSES!!

ahaha sorry i am totally just running on soda! i need to go eat something

goodbye!

keep calm and carry on!

lets hope we dont all die in 2012

peace!

longest post of nothing

things that occupy my mind late at night.

i am excited for my post christmas outfits (:

this jacket                                                pullover!                                        moccasins (:

my pink jeans!! (: i kept asking my mom if i was getting them, and she always said she didnt know. one time she asked if i would be sad if i didnt get them. umm yes! and i kept getting pants shaped boxes. these were the last things i opened, and i was so excited that i screamed.

oh! and here is my moms amazing christmas present!                                                  

yup. i made this.

moving on from christmas.

i neeeeed to redye my hair. its dull and sad looking. you know whats ironic? that when my hair was blonde,  it barely grew at ALL. but now that its red, and my roots come in when it grows, its been growing like a crazy mofo. stupid hair. im thinking of doing less red and more brown this time. thoughts? pretty sure no one will give me thoughts but there is no problem in trying (:

ummmm. new years goal? losing 20 lbs before i got to mehico. its nothing crazy. its just a i-want-to-rock-a-bikini-while-on-vacation-and-i-need-a-flat-stomach-to-do-that diet. haha that was really hard to type. soooooo yeah! want to join? i (being the nerd i am) calculated the amount of calories i need to be under each day. shouldnt be too hard. my mom might freak out when i am counting calories all the time. im not a crazy person who will stop eating! imma just be wayyyy healthier! and buy a super cute bikini for mehico.

ahhh umm moving on. i have a TON of things to do before the term ends! remember this post?
preetty much will be my life for the next two weeks.

A2- term final (not that that will be a problem for me. hahaha ive taken spanish like 213493874 times)
A3- i have to do solo ensamble the day i get back to school. luckily my name twin Haley (ahahaha obviously!!) is gunna help me! i probably havent helped myself at all by procrastinating to 5 days before i sing.
A4- powerpoint final. wont take me too long.
B1- PHYSICS. i hate it. test on tuesday, have to do homework, term projects (havent even started) are due in two weeks. ahhh. i procrastinate way too much
B2- nothing! all tests have been taken, all retakes taken. all i have to do is homework, which is a huge relief. unless he decides to be horrible and cram a chapter in before term ends, like he did last term.
B3- have to finish 300 pages of East of Eden by tuesday. it should be easy, except i cant find my freaking book!
B4- we have to make a story book about the history of biotechnology. i love making books (: in 8th grade, the book i made for honors history got chosen to be kept with the teacher. i kinda wish i hadnt let her keep it, because it was awesome.

other things.

i want to go to H&M. maybe my wonderful mother will take me after the term is over ... (:(:(:(: <3 <3

i STILL havent been answered to preference! i asked like two weeks ago. faiil. hopefully i will go! haha haley and i scrambled to get in a group, but weve got a great one (:

i want a boyfriend! there, i said it! not in a desperate, i will take anyone kind of way, but, seeing as BOTH my parents have said that its super strange that i dont have a boyfriend, it may be time for me to get one. yep. my father asked me why i dont have one. weird? yup. also, my 6 year old brother asked me as well. even he knows im socially awkward.
Yep pretty much me right tharr.

but i AM working on it. a boy? what? nothing!

stop asking me!

ahahah im so weird!!

today i went to  jump on it!



there i was, jumping into the foam pit and minding my own business, when suddenly this pack of girls walks in. and i swear, all of their eyes just FLEW to me, and they glared my down like nobodies business. and im like "what the freak is going on?". and it went on like that. everywhere i went in jump on it, there were these death eyes on me. it was pretty weird. i was like : NO. i do not look super cute right now, all sweaty, so you have no reason to stare at me!!

ahhh. i got a new memory foam on my bed. i have been feeling like an old grandma, i always wake up with my shoulders and back just KILLING. but my new foam has been helping quite a bit!

i absolutely love this outfit

who already has black jeans and a blue flowy top? this girl. who needs a vest like that? ahah present.

got asked out on a date for tonight, but then the guy remembered that he had to work.

nice.

uhmmm. christmas bucket list!

[X] sleep for longer than 12 hours

[X] have a clean room the whole time (mostly did this!)
[X] drink a lot of bubbly (bubbly enduced coma? yep)
[X] give my mom the most amazing present ever (just scroll up)
[X] go on a drive by the lake (on the way home from jump on it. the frozen lake is absolutely gorgeous)
[] get all my homework done before christmas (ahahahahahahh NOPE. not even close. not even a little)
[x] dont stress over grades (small x because i have been stressing only a little)
[X] make peanut butter chocolate fudge again (and i ate most of it too)
[] make carmel (nope :( )
[] hang out with all the people i said i would hang out with (NOT AT ALL. didnt hang out with anyone)
[X] ask someone to preference :) (best way ever. cupcakes. who doesnt love cupcakes?)
[] do something selfless (not yet!)
[] go through my room and take stuff to the D.I. (nope)
[x] go thrifting with megan (this hardly even deserves a small x. i looked at clothes at savers while my dad was looking for xbox cables)
[] do something crazy on new years eve (this is inpossible to do at the present time)
[] go see a midnight movie (i saw A movie. not at midnight though)
[] have the best christmas break ever! (hardly)

what i HAVE done

played lots of videogames

slept

played foosball

thought about how i should probably do my homework

went to the gym

ate wayyy too much

got a stomach ache from eating too much roll dough

read a lot of books

listened to too much music

drove my brothers lots of places

hardly note worthy .

also, i have been blowing up pinterest with weight loss pins. sorry about that. my faves

yep.

i think i should be done typing now, because i have been going for almost an hour and i have managed to type nothing of real value.

ill get back to you when i have something important to say

goodbye!

yep. i own this baby. its taking place of my infamous peace sign necklace

the day i got it (:

anways. gunna go to bed now. bye

ohhh hoolllyyy niiiiiight

christmas christmas christmas AHHH

today (and yesterday) was wonderfully festive. i have sooo much to say, but words get awefully boring, so here come a looootttt of pictures! (:

after hitting the gym con mi padre, we went home to an amazing dinner that wiped out all the calories we had just burnt. 

thats james. hes my friend.

moving on. after dinner, we headed downstairs for pajamas and christmas stories.

then we opened sibling presents. my littlest brother got me a sparkly hat (:

i stayed up suuuper late to help with cooking, and then fell asleep at 2:00 a.m.

and woke up at 7

wheeeeee.

we opened stockings

and then headed off to church!

yep thats me in my secretary outfit.

hahaha

then, we scooched back home, to open the rest of our lovely presents!!

WELL. since my computer is being totally retarded.

if you would like to see all the pics, head over to facebook

http://www.facebook.com/#!/haleyemma.fearless

mmmmmk bye

midnight ramblings

its one a.m. and i cant sleep. why you may ask? well, i woke up this morning at 7 with the stomach flu. my mom made me go back to sleep, and then i woke up at 1 without the stomach flu. i have officially only been up for 12 hours. soooo im not very tired! anyways. you, lucky reader, get to read my nonsensical ramblings that i am writing to keep myself entertained at this unholy hour.

first of all, i am SO glad i am not at school this week. i would probably be wearing sweats all week, seeing as i have exasperated my clothes, and i feel like i have nothing to wear. although i probably do, but my creative juices have not been flowing lately. i wish i could just go over to my grandmothers house (who is fabulous btw, i want to be just like her when i am old.) and steal all of her vintage clothes like this girl did. i am totally jealous. my grandma has all this super cool jewlery, and i wish she would just give it to me! haha noope. but yes. i am extremely glad that i am not at school, because i want to win best dressed my senior year, and spending a week with drab outfits would set me back a bit.

second. i am so ridiculously, totally unappropriatly excited for christmas. i know for sure that this will be the GREATEST christmas ever. mostly because i got my mom THE greatest gift ever! it will be so great, you dont even have any idea. aaand because i know that i am getting exactly what i wanted (: im sorry! im sooooooooo excited for my cheetah moccasins that i know are coming my way! my clothing juices will get flowing again! and that makes me really excited (:

third, i reeaaalllyyy need to redye my hair! its getting all faded and sad looking. my mom once said "our civilization is so sad. we can get a man on the moon, but we can't find a way to keep our hair red." hahaha so true! i think i will dye it from a box this time. i waant it back to bright red!

fourth, i watched monte carlo tonight, and i must say. i want an adventure like that! i (might ) be going to cabo san lucas this summer, and for my new years resolution, i have decided that i want a beach bod for that trip. i can do it right? i mean, if i can get an A in mr clarks class, then i can get a beach bod in six months. plus, i want to get in shape for summer cross country. its my last year, and i want to do the best i can.  aaaand yeah. no sugar for six months. i can totally do this.

fifth. iii neeeed tooo gooo tooo beeeeddd. aahh. i think i might go take some sleeping medicine. that will knock me right out. yep. goodbye

null

Get my license

have friends

love my family

go to parties

read all day

write poetry

get good grades

have self confidence

go to a dance

get out of the teenage girl rut

see the world differently

be unique

create

make music

give

be a faithful church going person

live life differently



the things I can do without you.
oh wait. my pictures from the photoshoot waayy back in october came today. my favorite one:

moments

hello folks. i have quite a few awkward moments for you today (:

that awkward moment when there is snow on all the concrete on your street, but none on the grass

that awkward moment when you see beer that is advertised as pologamy

that awkward moment when they dont sell picture frames that hold four pictures in them. ANYWHERE.
 i love this idea! maybe someday i will do it! haaa

that awkward moment when your best friends show up at zupas to bring you a christmas present
that other awkward moment when your brother takes a horrible picture of it

also. i have been seeing this around a lot lately

so. for the final awkward moment of the night.

that awkward moment when people are finally discovering a song that you listened to last november.

#hipsters 

look at my hipster self. awww yeahh

on the opposite side of the spectrum, i had quite a few excellent moments today.

that excellent moment when you know that your past is forgiven, and the demons can be buried.

today i hung out with jade yes, this is the jade. its so strange how a change of 12 months can bring such an intense healing. have you ever seen the movie Something Borrowed? well, read about it here

basically, the two girls have been friends their whole lives, and it is destroyed over a boy. pretty much my life? yep. but at the end, the two girls accidentally meet in the street and have conversation and they make peace with what happened. they are never friends again, and they never fully recover from the huge trajedy, but they make peace and they move on. i feel like that has happened to me. ive made peace. which is extremely good.  everything ended okay, just like in the movie.

that excellent moment when your dad trusts you enough to let you drive to the mall by yourself.

enough said (:

that excellent moment when you realize that christmas is less than a week away.

aaaand that awkward moment when you realize that you are more excited for christmas than any normal teenage girl should be.

speaking of moments. i want one like this

Four years ago, I was just a guy who had a crush on a girl, who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing that I've ever had to do, which was just to... wait...And, a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl I work with but I think, even then I knew that... I was waiting for my wife." -Jim Halpert

lovely (:

like this picture

good bye!

and for a change from my normal "keep calm and carry on"

WANT

busy busy busy

hello friends (:
this week has been quite eventful!

ive taken four really hard tests (and i did pretty well on all of them (: )

i made an (i think) amazing poetry book that i drew all the pictures for.

heres my favorite poem i did

Having a Coke with You
is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you.
in the warm New York 4 o’clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles
and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them
I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world


it took my quite a long time though! i only got four hours of sleep on thursday night.

on wednesday, i woke up 30 minutes later than i was supposed to, to have time to shower, but i managed to shower, blow dry, and straigten my hair, choose my outfit, and get to school in 30 minutes instead of 60. i felt accomplished.





aaaaand i got my lisence (:
of course my mom insisted on taking a picture of the monumentous occasion

 yay for driving! i took my brothers to target to look for my mom's christmas present. (it will be awesome). on friday i got to drive to school by myself! it was exciting (: we did nothing in any of my classes except in mr. clarks. of course. the christmas assembly was great! i also got my schedule all fixed for next year. its gunna be a killer. lets see. AP calculus, AP spanish, acapella (hopefully!), financial lit, AP government (maybe), p.e. (bleh), AP chemistry taken at timpanogos, and pharm tech MATC. whooo. i just love killing myself with school.



yesterday was the ward christmas party. it was actually really fun! i didnt think the food was going to be good (lets be honest, i am so picky that its usually not.) but the food we had was awesome! and they had a live baby playing baby jesus.

 THEN i drove myself to a christmas party. we had an ugly sweater contest, a white elephant exchange, a dance party in the freezing cold. it was super fun! and it was awesome just being able to leave, not waiting for your ride home being ready to leave, or waiting for your mom to come get you. i just got to leave. it was great. also. i decided who to ask to preference. lovely (:(:

also!

i am making a christmas break bucket list.

[X] sleep for longer than 12 hours
[] have a clean room the whole time
[] drink a lot of bubbly
[] give my mom the most amazing present ever
[] go on a drive by the lake
[] get all my homework done before christmas
[] dont stress over grades
[] make peanut butter chocolate fudge again
[] make carmel
[] hang out with all the people i said i would hang out with
[] ask someone to preference :)
[] do something selfless
[] go through my room and take stuff to the D.I.
[] go thrifting with megan
[] do something crazy on new years eve
[] go see a midnight movie
[] have the best christmas break ever! 

aand thats all i have for you.

who likes my new music thingy at the bottom of my page?!

iiiii dooooo (:

kay bye!