Monday, September 5, 2011

schoool

i wish i was a sophmore again. because i honestly dont know how to handle all of this stress that i already have from being a junior. i have the worst math teacher known to man, who teaches us nothing and then expects us to know how to test on it. then i have my freaking physics class, which is incredibly difficult, but we cant come in and ask questions because he doesnt do private tutoring. and i have biotech, which is a whole new thing to learn, and i cant study for the test tomorrow because her website isnt working. then i have my cross country team, who i am getting allt his pressure from to run, when i cant. i wish i could but my shins make it so i cant. and i have all of these things to deal with, and i have to worry about straight A's, because all i want is to get a scholarship, but im not a genius like the other people that i take hard classes with. so i have to do all of this work just to get the to the same level as they are, and i dont want to drop physics but i think that i might, because its just too hard, and im just not smart enough. and my parents are always telling me that i need to be nicer, and that i have a bad attitude about everything. im trying to balance every part of my life out, and its HARD. plus, my parents want me to get a job on top of all of that. so as i am sitting here bawling my eyes out because i have three tests tomorrow that i have no idea how to prepare for, i am wondering why i do this to myself. i could just as easily get a scholarship if i took normal physics right? or even physics 1010? all of it is freaking stressful, and im not getting any help from my physics partner, or my math teacher. i feels like im this total idiot that doesnt know how to do anything, and everyone else does. PLUS i havent gotten asked to mv homecoming. and everyone else has. i mean, i think im okay looking, right? im pretty nice, and i dont order really expensive things on the menu. why does no one want to go with me? why is the person i want to go with already asking someone else? life just sucks right now, and all i can do right now is go to bed, so thats what i am doing.
night..

2 comments:

  1. Haley! Call Sam (8014141894) He will help you find a part time job if you want, and he helps people find and apply for scholarships. There is help out there. You're not alone. What kind of Math is it? I used to tutor HS math kids. And would be happy to help if I can. Remember all you can do is your best and after you've done that it just takes a little bit of faith, and you don't have to be perfect. You are great just the way you are!

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  2. I agree with Andrea. You are not the only one that feels that way! I felt like that in HS too. And I even survived;) Keep your chin up it will get better. If you try to enjoy where you are right now it will get easier too. Love you Haley, I think you're amazing!!

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